Thursday, February 22, 2007

That's a Circle J Brand, Son. You Have To Earn It.

I've always had a mildly subversive streak. If there's a way to point out the absurdities in something, or put an obviously silly spin on a serious thing, I...just...can' It's a compulsion. Reality, though, has a tendency to outdo even my best efforts.

Take, for instance, the perfectly solid Vacation Bible School Curriculum we're using this year at the church. It's the Western-themed "Avalanche Ranch: A Wild Ride Through God's Word" curriculum, full of lively characters, catchy tunes, and genially straightforward Bible messages. Though it's going to make for a great VBS, that little mischievous voice in my head kept spitting out sophomoric ways to mess with the name. Like, say, changing it to "Avalanche Ranch: Where We Brand Your Children for Jesus." A couple of weeks ago, I shared that useless little thought with my wife, who told me I'm a doofus.

So in my mail yesterday, I get a flyer for the program, which included text that read: "If you've ordered your starter kit, be on the lookout for your free branding iron."